Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Cindy and I were talking this morning about bullying. She said she was so traumatized by the bullies of her childhood that their full names are ingrained in her psyche, even to this day. As we talked, it became apparent that she actually suffered relatively few bullies over the early years; but the memories linger.
She asked me if I knew the names of my early tormentors. I laughed at the question, because I had so many bullies in my life that it would be impossible to just name a few.
I think my 12---15 age range was the worst. Unlike today, where we have laws and strict rules about bullying at school, back then we had to deal with it. It took a couple of years, but I eventually got the hang of it. I learned that bullies would stop bullying when someone finally taught them a lesson. Usually this lesson was administered in the form of some kind of knock in the noggin' with a bat or some such instrument.
James D was a tormentor of mine when I was 17 years old. He was bigger and stronger than me and delighted in slapping me around in front of my girl friend. He stopped doing that after I came up behind him and hit him over the head with a hammer.
In later life, we will all have to face our bullies. Bullies exist in every age group and every corner of our lives---the workplace, church (Yes, church!), in the neighborhood, in social settings, etc. Therefore, it is important to learn to deal with them effectively immediately upon recognition. Once they learn that you are weak and will not resist their offensive behavior, they will continue to abuse you. Best to "nip it in the bud", as we say down south, than to allow them any early success.
A few things to always remember about bullies:
---Bullies have low self-esteem. They seek to raise their self-esteem by putting others around them down
---Bullies thrive where others avoid them and refuse to confront them
---Bullies exist in all age groups. There is a common misconception that children/teenagers "outgrow" bullying. This is utterly false
In much of the world today, liberal, "enlightened" souls have constructed rule upon rule to prevent and deal with bullying. I say this is a bad practice. Let's deal with bullies the way God intended---by making them realize they are behaving badly and no one is going to put up with it. That way, not only is the bully rehabilitated into society, but those who were victims can be strengthened through overcoming adversity.