Wednesday, February 16, 2011

The Bully.......

Cindy and I were talking this morning about bullying.  She said she was so traumatized by the bullies of her childhood that their full names are ingrained in her psyche, even to this day.  As we talked, it became apparent that she actually suffered relatively few bullies over the early years; but the memories linger.

She asked me if I knew the names of my early tormentors.  I laughed at the question, because I had so many bullies in my life that it would be impossible to just name a few.

I think my 12---15 age range was the worst.  Unlike today, where we have laws and strict rules about bullying at school, back then we had to deal with it.  It took a couple of years, but I eventually got the hang of it.  I learned that bullies would stop bullying when someone finally taught them a lesson.  Usually this lesson was administered in the form of some kind of knock in the noggin' with a bat or some such instrument.

James D was a tormentor of mine when I was 17 years old.  He was bigger and stronger than me and delighted in slapping me around in front of my girl friend.  He stopped doing that after I came up behind him and hit him over the head with a hammer.

In later life, we will all have to face our bullies.  Bullies exist in every age group and every corner of our lives---the workplace, church (Yes, church!), in the neighborhood, in social settings, etc.  Therefore, it is important to learn to deal with them effectively immediately upon recognition.  Once they learn that you are weak and will not resist their offensive behavior, they will continue to abuse you.  Best to "nip it in the bud", as we say down south, than to allow them any early success.

A few things to always remember about bullies:

---Bullies have low self-esteem.  They seek to raise their self-esteem by putting others around them down

---Bullies thrive where others avoid them and refuse to confront them

---Bullies exist in all age groups.  There is a common misconception that children/teenagers "outgrow" bullying.  This is utterly false

In much of the world today, liberal, "enlightened" souls have constructed rule upon rule to prevent and deal with bullying.  I say this is a bad practice.  Let's deal with bullies the way God intended---by making them realize they are behaving badly and no one is going to put up with it.  That way, not only is the bully rehabilitated into society, but those who were victims can be strengthened through overcoming adversity.

What do you think?  Input, please.


  1. Even reading this entry about bullies makes me feel a little "funny" about my worst times with my bully of my youth and my current bullies. I had to suffer alone when I was a child, I was too afraid to tell anyone, he would have made it worse for me.

    Wow, I am sitting here about to cry. I think I am going to have to do my own blog on bullies. Maybe that will make me feel better to write more about it there.

    A good blog, Clint ... and so true.

  2. I am not sure how I feel about all these laws about bullying. It is observed in nature in any animal that lives in a social group.With in wolf packs the bullying is said to strengthen the hunt behavior in the stronger wolves. It happens. I can see education on the subject, but laws?

  3. Hi Clint, you faithful soul,

    I always like reading your blog again. Sorry about that I use the goole translator. I hope it's not too terrible.

    About the bullying I have reported already in my blog.

    I would not let me now please. But children can be cruel.

    Be greeted warmly by Sabine

  4. Off the top of my head --- That all bullying is the result of low esteem is a given, but within that group called bullies there are different types and degrees of behavior. Laws are required to deal with some of them. Our kids are taught stealing is wrong, I see nothing wrong in teaching bullying is wrong. I have no problem with public disclosure of who the bullies are and what they have done, but I don't think hammers are the answer either. I just wish our children had been raised with more spine and could better resist the pack mentality. They know right from wrong no matter how they try to rationalize their behavior. Laws are needed to address some of that behavior, education the rest. The real problem - and this is just my opinion - is that past a certain age the only type of growth that's occurs is cancer. I don't think you can change the behavior of a bully but you can make sure its not tolerated or rewarded. Have a good evening...Mary

  5. Yes...bullying is really bad, and in these days you can find them very often in internet communitys. Telling them that they are tomentors is wrong, because they are having fun about the situation. You should ignore them.

    In real life I agree with Mary. Laws are needed.

  6. Hi Clint -

    I'm not sure what the full steps are but I believe that we should love bullies with reasonable authority in action.

    Recently, I read about bullying in senior citizen homes - mean seniors. My heart went out to their victims who must share the same facilities with them.

  7. As hard as I tried to recall bullies in my life, I could not find any, maybe there was none. I asked my son, and he said he didn't have any either. Bullying exists, I am just surprised that I escaped it.